I’ve had a gutful of techno-snobbery. A
couple of weeks ago, when I posted on
Twitter “
Sydney Morning Herald
going
tabloid/compact from tomorrow. Is
The Age
doing the same?”, @BrettS69 replied “Do they
still sell paper newspapers? Really?”
That same day I tweeted: “Two weeks ago,
I rang bank to request something. They said
they’d call back. I’ve now decided I should
call them and no record of my initial call.”
@Trimega responded: “Who calls a bank
anymore?” And, I can’t begin to tell you how
much e-laughter I cop whenever I admit that
I still have an AOL email address.
I recently turned 41 and am starting to
get an understanding of what it’s like to be
ridiculed by the next generation. And I don’t
like it. I do my best to keep up – heck, I know
what Pheed is! But when I mentioned all this
to a 60-ish fellow customer at the bakery the
other day, he just nodded slowly, smiled and
said: “You have a long way to go yet!”
So at the risk of sounding curmudgeonly
and stuck-in-my-ways, leave me alone! Yes, I
still buy the paper. Yes, I ring the bank. And
while we’re at it, no I won’t use self-checkout
at the supermarket, because I believe that’s
taking people’s jobs away. I much prefer
to buy from a shop in Brisbane than order
online from overseas. I choose 2D over 3D.
And I still have a street directory in the car!
Look, I’m not anti-technology but I
believe we should be allowed to make our
own choices and move at our own speed,
without the judgement of others.
And now, perhaps the most useful thing
you’ll read today! We’ve all made the
mistake of stacking glasses and having two
stick together. My wife Nikki recently came
home with a dozen tumblers, unusual in
that they had lumps or bumps of glass all
around the inside. They looked great but
those bumps really knew how to hold onto
another glass!
The first night we used them, it
happened! I just could not separate the two
glasses!
So, I turned to Twitter and Facebook
for ideas (as I said, I’m not anti-technology).
Solutions on Twitter included “Run
under hot water” (@LovelyWife), “Twist”
(@LaurenTrim), “Tap around rim” (@RoBaumgart) and “Put them in the freezer”
(@Edumak8). There was also this from @Jim_Pembroke: “Fill top glass with a good
whiskey, straight, ice if you must, and drink.
Repeat until the bottom glass blurs into
obscurity”! And from @SEQMW: “There is
nothing you can do except smash one
glass. But which one? It’s like choosing
favourite child!”
Meanwhile, on Facebook, Neil Symes
suggested “run it under cold water”, Kathryn
Cruise said “bottom in hot water the way
to go” and Bill McDonald wrote “small side
to side shimmies, while gently pulling in
opposite directions. Throw the odd twist in
there. Make it look fancy!”
In the end, it was a combination of
Twitter and Facebook solutions that did the
trick. So write this down. From my mum on
Facebook, “pour washing up liquid into the
top where the two glasses are stuck” and
from @RobertHoge on Twitter, “cold water
in the top glass, place the bottom third of the
bottom glass in hot water and give it a few
minutes”. Hey presto! It worked!
Once the ordeal was over, former radio
host Ian Skippen turned blogger (for laughs,
please check out
www.ianskippen.blogspot.
com.au
) told me: “Never stick a glass into a
glass. You can never decide which glass is
half full or half empty. One glass is always
half full. Don’t thank me. Just say...glassias!”
On the subject of glasses and drinking,
a local winemaker showed me a simple
method he uses to improve a bottle of red.
Decant into a big jug, then pour forcefully
into another jug and back into the first.
Repeat, getting more and more dramatic,
pouring from higher and higher. Depending
on who you’re drinking with, you may want
to pour the wine back into the bottle before
serving. It’s all about aeration, of course.
Nothing new there, but as we’ve found,
getting the jugs out makes for an exciting
pre-dinner show for guests!
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